Legitimately semi-blackout across the table from the governor off a chardonnay i can't even pronounce.
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
He told me that he's proud of our abnormalcy as a couple. I think it's the most romantic thing he's ever said.
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
Randomize
