4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
Make note: the first date is too soon to make the "condoms are only for making balloon animals" joke.
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
You know how the doctor said I need to stop being vegan unless I find a way to get more protein? There's protein in beer. The doctor wants me to drink more beer.
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
Randomize
