Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
but the good news is i woke up with 15 dollars in my pocket so i probably sold my phone instead of puking on it
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
What did you wear last night? Because I'm pretty sure there are atleast 4 Facebook statuses about your walk of shame.
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
Oh yeah, nothing says welcome home like walking in on your parents having sex on your bed while the dog is watching, they told me to wait until they were done...
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
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