yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
We left around 4am, just after you laid down on your front lawn to take a piss. After 15 mins I said "dude are you still peeing?" you replied "Nope, just laying here with my dick out."
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
Hi this is the guy from the cell phone store. Your Dad just upgraded your phone as a surprise. I didn't tell him about your topless pics on your phone. I transfered them to new phone. Nice rack!
She's officially a Tinder poltergeist.
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
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