I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
I've spent 9 hours vomitting in the fetal position... how did i stay like this for 9 months?
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
The cops are here to take me to jail, so I guess I have to go with them. If I'm not out by 6 p.m., there is some left-over lasagna in the fridge for you.
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
I just licked a piece of cheese off my phone screen if that makes you feel any better
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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