You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
nothing says "functioning mature adult" like sneaking beer out of your mom's fridge in a lunchbox
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
Guess who just bought an ounce of pot via Paypal, and paid for it with my airline Visa card to earn miles?
Congratulations. That business degree is finally worth every penny it cost you.
I swear to god if you keep eating my cats food drunk I am going to kick you out of our apartment.
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
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