I just remembered I gave a homeless man a ride to his bridge last night.
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
We got hammered last night and I woke up this morning with texts from 'iron maiden chick.' wtf?
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
I have just received a gold-medal-deserving sext. He wrote me a fucking novel. Not only am I incredibly turned on but I am beyond impressed. He is the sext god. I must bow to him.
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
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