I just broke up with my girlfriend lets go find strippers that need rent money.
Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
Just saw cops pull over the ice cream truck. What a dick
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
Well my grandma put the turkey in the oven for 4 hours and didn't have the oven on.
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
Randomize
