were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
quit re-tweeting John McCain's tweets
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
Seriously. My exes act like they own shares of my vagina.
Well, in their defense, they have invested a lot of time and money
Are my feet made of real feet?
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
Punched myself in the face trying to open a bottle of Vicodin one handed. Night is going well.
Randomize
