I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
We're sending your burrito through the mail slot.
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
I legit just woke up on my couch, snuggled up next to some guy who's wearing my roommate's pink bathroble. What the fuck do they put in those shots?
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
Hey texans ride hard. He should have known what he was in for when I asked to sit on his face. The broken nose was a BADGE he just earned.
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
Randomize
