so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
they call him Oral-B. enough said
Dude. I kneed him in the face and gave him a black eye. It's like a constant reminder of our hookup. I feel like herpes. I never go away...
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
If this first date goes well and I like him, I won't sleep with him. But if it doesn't go well, I'll sleep with him.
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
Randomize
