Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
Never thought going to McDonald's alone at 3 AM would end with a blowjob outside some random girl's apartment...
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
At least you didn't wake up next to your professor who then proceeded to cancel class via phone while still inside of me.
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
Oh god I found a set of car keys in my pocket, and I have no idea who's they are
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
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