Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
you were saying "i am the vodka queen!" and then in a different voice replying to yourself "all hail the vodka queen! you are so beautiful!"
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
I passed out and slept in my car. Now I feel like a hungover zoo animal. Look and laugh people, look and laugh.
She said she forgot something.. and when she came out she was carrying a garden gnome, and a bottle of vodka. she was too hot to question it.
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
I'm laying in bed cuddling with my teddy bear and eating waffles. I need a fucking boyfriend
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
Randomize
