Seriously dude, you need to stop beating off to the ellen show, it's just weird.
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
its raining. im dressed as yoda and im trick or treating alone. and i wonder why im still a virgin..
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
The bartender just told me he would have me face down in his pillow by the end of the night. I hate when you make me go to gay clubs.
I told him I would only take his calls if he was dead, dying, capturing a midget, or buying me shots.
I stand by my new policy.
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
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