erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
I think the duck is in my room. You have no idea how much worse a duck makes a hangover
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
Woke up this morning to a bunch of snapchats of you drunkenly yelling at grasshoppers. Good night?
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