I might come over and watch a movie but I can't spend the night. my parents would wonder where i was
you're 26.
She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
I woke up to find his roommate face down on the couch with no pants on, with a sticky note that said "was lost but now am found"
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
Why did I wake up in bed with the ironing board and a Mariah Carey mask? Vodka hates me
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
Randomize