Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
But Keith is doing MDMA for New Years and he's 39.
Keith has a beautiful 20 year old girlfriend, a good job and a cute puppy. We can't all be Keith.
But I want to be Keith.
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
I should probably apologize for licking you last night since you drove me home, but I stand by my decision
Randomize