she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
I blacked out at the bar, and blcked in getting a handjob on a roller coaster. Sober me is jealous of drunk me.
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
Why is there no Netflix category for "I just wanna cry, but I don't have time for a whole romcom"?
Getting dome in the backseat of a friends car with Ariana Grande playing in the background was probably the most romantic part of my night
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
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