You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
I was just told that i'm a premature cuddler. . . What does that even mean?
Whatever it is you failed
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
I peed in my sheets during a dream. Like straight up. A whole new drunk.
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
Randomize