im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
Tell me why I'm at Target and this entire Spanish family is crowding around the condoms questioning which ones they should get
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
I remember climbing onto your table and singing"tequila tequila" into your candlesticks. I apologize.
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
Anyone who does not know who Paul McCartney is does NOT get to put hands in my pants
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