we have officially mastered the walk of shame
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
You should be grateful to be my roommate. My booty calls always drive you places in the morning.
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
Changing from sweatpants to jeans at 3 in the afternoon makes the day seem so much more productive than it actually was.
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
a cabby told me that vodka is the coors light of liquor, and then gave me his number
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
I have one of those hangovers where you visualize how awesome it would be to climb in your fridge and drink glacier water
Dude. Went to buy some jack and sailor Jerry, when the guy at the counter realized it was my birthday everybody in the store including the stoners and the elderly sang to me. Then they gave me shots of moonshine. 21st bday was a success
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
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