My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
This is one of those times I wish I had a time machine so I could go back and punch myself in the face to make me realize what I need to do before it's too late
Why did I wake up with condoms on all my fingers?
Considering the girl you hooked up with, I'd be concerned about not having one on your penis.
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
After I came she just held my balls until I fell asleep. It was like adult swaddling. Magical...
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
i woke up with a shamrock tattoo on my wrist and a fat bruise on my hipbone. please tell me its not real.
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