Dude im not sure whos apartment i woke up in but i just showered here and their shampoo in phenomenal
"Tuesday" and "open-bar" shouldn't be used in the same sentence.
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
He came to my Harry Potter marathon wearing a Hogwarts uniform. Of course I fucked him.
HE STARTED HUMMING THE THEME TO STAR WARS!! WHILE I'M SUCKING HIS DICK!!
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
Did that sound smart? Cuz beneath the boozy exterior beats the heart of a fucking scientist.
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
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