i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
Changing from sweatpants to jeans at 3 in the afternoon makes the day seem so much more productive than it actually was.
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
I ran into the kitchen halfway through hooking up cause I forgot I put the cookies on the oven too high. Came back and she was gone but the only thing I could think about was all the extra cookies I could eat now. Got through about 6 before I realized why she left.
You said you brought chipotle into a movie and I asked you to marry me and you said yes
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
also, my mom just called to make sure the dick tattoo on your arm was fake..
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
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