i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
There was a lot of him and a little penis
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
Oh and I guess I added our cab driver on Facebook. He has "liked" every single one of my beach pictures. Kill me now.
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
I was having a dream that I was swimming in a pool filled with melted chocolate but woke up to find I had poured chocolate milk all over my body
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
OMG I DIDNT READ THAT TEXT CAREFULLY CAUSE I'M ON THE DEVILS LETTUCE & I THREATENED TO PUNCH A CHILD OMG I'M SO SORRY
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