are you still at the devil's house?
im sorry i hit your dog last night,,,i didnt even see it
I dont have a dog?
WTF
I told him to come back in 5mins cause i needed to take a few more shots before i could talk to him
bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
I feel fat after drinking my meal replacement shake.
I added chocolate sauce, a bsg of m&ms and a crushed up brownie to make it taste better.
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
I hate when people see you passed out in your front yard and call 911. Like what, you can't take a nap face down on your steps at 4pm?
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
Taking a shit on the side of the road is not how I imagined this morning would start.
Prepare for massive TMI but anyway long story short I have a Swiss flag band-aid across my balls.
What a patriot you are. How'd it happen?
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
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