look no pants
just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
I just realized that at some point last night I told someone I would only be friends with 16% of them because the other 84% stole my people's land
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
Look, you don't know disfunction until you've sat on the john taking a shit and crying while totally sober.
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
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