I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
Wheres my "thanks for using birth control effectively and not contributing to the downfall of society" card.
You should've come to the party. It was like an identity parade of everyone you screwed last year.
His voice is like having sex with hot chocolate and then suddenly you're pregnant.
Oh you have the munchies, Dad? That's great and congratulations on the weed but STOP EATING MY APPLE PIE
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
I think weed is turning my hair brown
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
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