that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
Watermelon juice. Makes everything better. Gin. Wine. EVERYTHING.
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
Randomize