The pickup line "You look exactly like my sister" would only work in Arkansas...SCORE!!
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
I can't figure out how to get this beer bong in my carry on without airport security questioning me as it goes through the x-ray.
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
Literally had to stick my hands in my pants and hold my butt cheeks together while driving
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
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