My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
pick me up and take me to a bathroom i have to shit
no
the bathroom is right infront of the beerpong table
im sorry you werent invited but you live 2 blocks away PLEASE
I'm on the strip, it's like a mini new years eve. Some girl just got taken away on a stretcher with her meter margarita in her hand claiming it's trophy for being awesome. Damn tourists are lightweights.
My 10 year old son gave me a bottle of jameson for fathers day. Did you have something to do with this?
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
Watching Argentina vs Germany during a wedding on an iPhone. Thank you Steve Jobs.
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
He chucked my pickle at the bouncer. Fucker, I wanted that.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
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