I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
Can you explain to me later why there's a pirate hat in my bathtub
So I vaguely remember making out with you this morning, I think you were on a date?
Found my wallet. It was under my dresser with a note that said "good job you found me". Drunk me is an ass.
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
Fun Fact: I do not remember what its like to be sober between drinking off and on for two weeks at my "vacation" and being on painkillers for my mouth now
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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