Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
Hey, could you leave the door unlocked? Keys seem hard right now.
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
What the hell man, you basically stole my girlfriend with a bucket of KFC.
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
After we'd both come, we started writing a book about dragons. Woke up this morning to a full English breakfast. Can't thank you enough for introducing us
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
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