You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
She wrote me a poem titled "Penis Flower" and it wasnt a joke
THAT WAS PROBABLY MY ONE CHANCE TO SLEEP WITH A MAN NAMED BORIS AND YOU RUINED IT.
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
I could seriously attempt to try and saw my head in half with a butter knife cause im pretty sure it could not hurt any more than it already does
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
Waking up in a NH rest stop and reading through my texts is definitely a familiar low
Kinda awkward to hear your aunt complain about loose women when you're in town to be a stunt dick for a swingers convention. Just sayin.
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
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