yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
My mom and dad are smoking a joint while lecturing me on what to bring and how to act in Europe. I'll finish this glass of wine and head over.
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
I just accidentally showed an old lady a pic of my penis while showing her cat pics. So how's your day going?
i need to stop meeting underage girls and letting them into the bar. i mean yea its a surefire way to get laid without having to tell them I'm 26 but i feel like as a bouncer I'm focusing on all the wrong things
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!
I woke up on the floor with 2 cartons of cigarettes, a box of chocolate bars, and a business card for a man named Larry. Don't remember him, but if the Rols on his card is his, I might throw him a mouth party...
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
