'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
no you cant smoke seaweed
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
Two options. One, you listen while I freak out. Two, we have mediocre to awesome car sex and don't talk. Either way, I'll be there by 7
If you think you're having a bad day, know that upon waking up, I was informed that I blew my nose in a piece of bread last night
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
I have to choose between charging my phone or my vibrator. This is bullshit.
Just met my future wife. Please dont fuck her.
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
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