Will you blow on my dice?
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
He interrupted me giving him head to ask if I were hungry, because he wanted to eat pizza. Wtf.
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
Randomize
