I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
One of my students just told me turtles are lazy and need to get a job. Fuck yes, my job here is done.
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
What's the policy for hitting on a girl at a funeral? She seems more bored than sad.
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
I woke up in a sink... Not like curled up on top of it though. I was standing, bent over, face first. IN THE DAMN SINK.
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
Randomize
