Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
so on a scale from morning glass of wine to that time i burnt the garage down how drunk were you last night
About 'lets tie a boat to a truck and ride it down the freeway'
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
Randomize
