what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
You really need to take down the pics of you and your boyfriend on facebook. It's becoming increasingly harder to jerk off while i'm Facebook stalking your pics at 2am.
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
And tan into my neighbor in the elevator. She was going to the gym. I was covered in mascara and dog hair eating a hash brown
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
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