did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
Fun holiday story for you: Alex and I went out drinking. She left. I needed a ride home. Met this dude and told him to drive my car back. Once at my house, I made him take out my dog and then apologized for not wanting to make out with him. I said, let me go see if my roommate is interested and then I slept in Alex's bed all night.
20 bucks says he was an actual leprechaun
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
Randomize
