Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
My roommate's all sad and is crying and the chick I want to bang is in the room and Nic Cage is on fire. What the fuck.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
As I was about to go to sleep he asked me if I was ready to 69. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK AT HIM IN THE FACE OVER DINNER TOMORROW
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
1) I'm a decent drunk texter. 2) My world is spinning. 3) I'll give you a dollar and a hug for a glass of water. 4) I love you. 5) Example: your penatrive ways are overwhelming my alternative lyfestyle. 6) That is all.
7) Noodle arms: engage
The example was me just using big words while hammered. You're welcome. Ambidextrious. I spelled it right.
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
"Fuck all you guys I'm going to be Cameltoe Spider-Man for Halloween."
just like fucking own it. stare that cop in the eye and just keep masturbating "yeah motherfucker Im high as shit and this feels great"
So you've been sexting me while spending time with your family
I'm a family man but I have priorities
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
I just smoked weed out of a tomahawk, then chased an armadillo with said tomahawk, I love my life.
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