there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
Awkward interaction of the day: Staring at some guy trying out if he is or is not the guy that woke me up yesterday by getting arrested in front of my apartment.
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
I paid off a credit card today. And I was tested negative for HIV. AND I did laundry. Honestly, I'm most excited about the laundry.
VOOOODKA VOOODKA WE PLEDGE OUR LOVE TO THEEEE VODKAAAA VODKAAAA SAVIOR OF LIBERTYYYY
Why even have a ground level apt if you're not gonna let me climb out the window? I hate walk of shaming in front of toddlers...
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
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