got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
We were in bed, and he looked at me and asked if I'd be weirded out if he took his leg off. BEST.SEX.EVER.
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
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