you know you are hungover when... you set your alarm for the next time you think you are going to throw up
this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
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