I'm totally gay for Miss Californiaaaaaa
oh sweet, sweet irony
I just got a ticket for shitting on a sand dune.
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
Ew. He is mine. We all know that if he has a mid-life crisis and decides to sleep with a student, I AM THAT STUDENT. She's not friends with him on FB. Reassuring.
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
She's walking down the sidewalk with a notebook, a pencil, and a box of cheez its while yelling profanities at small animals.... I'm going 2 ask her where she was before this.
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
Randomize
