you turned your livingroom into a bong?
there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
he shattered multiple jars of jelly against his roommates doors last night. this morning the asian one wouldn't even talk to him because he thought he was gonna get beaten up
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
My new years resolution is to be alive new years morning
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
If this nail lady pinches my achilles one more time im kicking her directly in her bedazzled boobs
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
My cat licked the coke mirror and now is giving me dirty looks. Bet money she has the drip.
Randomize