just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
I'm honored that you could tear yourself away from your girlfriend's vagina long enough to text me.
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
I just met a stripper in the light of day who I ate a candy bikini off her body. This is how my weekend is going.
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
Apparently I was carrying around a bottle of listerine calling it 5 loco
Randomize
