OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
A good Q tip ear swabbing is better than bad sex.
I'm pretty sure the only race ive ever won was to my mothers egg
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
i think i scared a bird with my dick
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
I just put vodka in my apple sauce. Spice up your fucking life.
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
Randomize
