well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
she spent the whole night flailing her arms because "primates are the only species who can move their arms like that and we shouldn't waste it"
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
She tried to subtly measure me, but I noticed. She told me I barely made the cut otherwise there would have been just a handshake as a parting gift.
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
So I took a screenshot of my boarding pass and the TSA agent somehow swiped it to the next photo. Yep...TSA saw my dick before I even went through the body scanner.
Randomize
